Entry # 1
Just this afternoon, I heard a man sing James Ingram's Just Once and thought about Rachel and Ross's on-and-off relationship in F.R.I.E.N.D.S.
If you have seen and watched the entire series, there was a scene when they found out Chandler Bing can't cry. They made several attempts to see his eyes well up to the point Monica made him picture his life with her until she dies. A sad portrait to imagine I know, but nope, Chandler is just not one to cry.
Before the episode ended though, he finally teared up. What caused the waterwork? It was the realization Rachel and Ross can't seem to make their relationship work despite the fact that they love each other.
I know it's just a show but stories like this make me sad in some way. Even as an outsider, it's painful to watch people part ways after witnessing them survive many storms together. And in the end, all those efforts for what? All for nothing.
But can we really say it's all for nothing though? Sometimes I prefer to look at life as a journey of owning and winning moments. I mean, there is only one end after all - death. So in between, all we have are moments. Spending thousands of meaningful days with someone only to part ways in the end... Is it really so bad? I 'd like to think the end does not erase the process nor the journey. So we should live in moments, I mean really live in the moment.
I think we should be allowed to fight for the things we hold dear in our hearts at least once in our life... no matter how foolish, no matter how futile.
But we should also learn to forgive ourselves when things don't work out. We often forget this part.
I mean we often think about what could've been or what might have made the difference. We beat ourselves hard for losing relationships, - both romantic ones and precious friendships. Then we feel bad and dwell on the tail part. The end part where the pain stings so bad. And suddenly, we think of the time shared together as just, well, a waste of time, For some people, they even say like they've been robbed of precious years in their lives.
I think it's sad to think that way. I think all relationships must have happy and sad boxes. No matter how happy or sad the ending is, the happy moments must stay in the happy box, the same goes for the unpleasant ones. You both made and earned them. They have to stay where they are.
And maybe by doing so, we cannot say that a relationship has failed.
Or even say a sadder one like "love has failed"
We can just say the relationship has ended.
And I think it wouldn't be so bad for things to end when you have saved things in your happy boxes. It would be sad yes, but was your time really wasted? Maybe not.
I think I've been meandering with my thoughts for a while here but what I want to say is that we can always take something from a relationship no matter how good or bad it ended.
And to end this random thought post; here's the lyric video of the song that would also remind you of Rachel and Ross if you've watched F.R.I.E.N.D.S
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fensuxqf0oM
